Pokemon Is Serious Business
by Sakura Mau Toki
Summary: At least in Gilbert's mind anyway.


**Author's Note: ****I have finally gotten around to writing this little cracky oneshot which has been floating around on my laptop for some time. This one features Prussia/Canada (one of my many OTP's) with some America(n) on the side. And pokemon too, of course.**

**Some notes on this fic:**

**-This was inspired by my random crack muise so I apologise if things seem out of place.**

**-I personally like both Black and White and don't think that one is better than the other; I just thought it would be funny to add that little bit of rivalry between Gilbert and Alfred.**

**-Hockey Night In Canada is infact serious business to Canadians here (the hockey fans anyway) and Saturday nights are typically referred to as 'Hockey night' (at least from the comedy skits I've seen as well as what some people here call it.**

**-I also apologise if the Canadian sterotypes offend other Canadians. This fic is purely crack (with some satire thrown in) and was not made to offend anyone.**

**PS: Pokemon is still serious business; Matt just makes hockey more important XD**

**Also, both country and human names are used in this fic.**

**That being said...**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Pokemon, Hetalia, or any of its characters, places, etc. All credit goes to Nintendo, Hidekaz Himaruya, The Pokemon Company, etc.**

**Rating: T+**

**Pairings/Characters: Prussia/Canada, America, mentions of France.**

**Warnings: Slight language and adult themes, America, Pokemon and Gilbert.**

**Enjoy the fic~**

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><p>Matthew Williams sighed in pleasure as he sat on his back porch, a cup of coffee in his hands with Kumajirou laying asleep by his feet as he watched the various birds and wildlife pass him by. It wasn't often that the Canadian could have some relaxing alone time and he was all too willing to take advantage of such opportunities when they arose.<p>

Yes it was rather nice just to sit here, relax, listening to the wonderful sounds of nature-

"OI MATTIE! THE AWESOME ME HAS FOUND SOMETHING AWESOME!"

Or the equally lovely tone of his excited Prussian lover as he, most likely, barged through the door again and probably broke it in the process like last time.

With a reluctant sigh and one last look at his backyard, the Canadian trudged inside and met with a shaggy mess of silver hair as he was lifted in the air.

"You'll never guess what happened, Mattie!" Gilbert exclaimed as the Canadian smiled calmly down at him.

"You got Francis to settle down with someone?" Mattie was then met with an incredulous look.

"Franny 'settling down'? West has more of a chance of becoming a _stripper _than Franny does of not screwing everyone he meets," Gilbert deadpanned as Matthew laughed.

"I know; I was making a joke Gil'," he said as the albino rolled his eyes.

"Well, I have something better and totally more awesome than both Franny _and_ West," Gilbert said proudly, puffing out his chest after setting his lover back down.

"And what would that be, a clone of yourself?"

"Psh, of course not! _No one_ is more awesome and sexy than me, that goes for clones too."

"Mhm whatever helps you sleep at night," Matthew replied as Gilbert huffed.

"I'm trying to be serious here!" he whined, giving Mattie a rather pouty expression as the Canadian grinned.

"Alright, alright, I believe you~" Matthew said, walking back into the kitchen as the Prussian followed.

"That was so not awesome, Birdie."

"You'll get over it, Gilbert. Now what's so awesome that you barged into my house and nearly took out my front door?" the Canadian asked, turning to his lover as the albino pulled out a copy of Pokemon Black.

"I just got this from Japan a few hours ago, so I had to come right here and show you!" Gilbert exclaimed proudly as Matthew looked the game over.

"I already know about it Gil; Alfred got me a copy of White since he somehow got two of them," Matthew replied as the excited expression fell from the albino's face.

"But White isn't as awesome as Black!" Gilbert said as Matthew puttered about the kitchen, collecting various snack foods and maple flavoured products for the upcoming Leafs/Habs game that was set to come on in a few hours. There was nothing more Canadian, in Matthew's opinion, than sitting in front of your TV screen, a can of Labatt's in hand as you watched the Leafs and Habs face off on center ice.

Yes Matthew was looking forward to a relaxing evening of watching the game; yelling at the TV over the referee's unfair calls as most Canadians do on a Saturday night before watching Don Cherry give his commentary afterwards. Matthew was so lost in his thoughts that he almost tuned out his excited lover as the Prussian ranted about all the reasons Black was superior to Alfred's 'crappy little White' version.

"Oi Birdie! Are you listening to me?"

"Hm? Of course I am, Gilbert. I have to go to the liquor store and get a six pack for the game, alright?" Matthew replied, grabbing his house keys from the kitchen counter before heading towards the door. "Feel free to make yourself comfortable, as long as you don't touch the TV, eh."

"The awesome me shall be here, Birdie," Gilbert said, pulling out his black and white DS as the blond walked out the door. "Time to show everyone how awesome I am!" With that, the albino popped the game into the DS and started what would soon be hours of non-stop gaming.

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><p>"Let's see; two bowls of chips, a plate of maple cream cookies, a six pack of Blue's, various pendants and flags of the teams... I think I'm good to go!" Matthew said cheerfully, picking up the various items and carrying them out to the room where his lover had been sitting for the past few hours playing his game. Shaking his head lightly, the Canadian set down the various food stuffs before grabbing the remote to turn on the TV.<p>

"You know you're going to have a headache later, right Gil?" Matthew asked, turning to his lover as Gilbert waved him off.

"Yeah yeah, but I'm not stopping now! I already have three badges, kesesese." Matthew simply rolled his eyes lightly, a small smile forming on his lips as he finished setting up for the game. The good thing about tonight's game was that he didn't have to worry about any interruptions (or the various attempts at having his vitals seized as he tried to watch the match) since Gilbert was now engrossed in his game.

Or so he had hoped before another unwanted interruption burst through the door.

"Hey Mattie; you in here?" Alfred called out; entering the living room to find food already on the coffee table and the TV on the pre-game warm up. "Sweet everything's ready!"

Matthew sighed. "I thought you weren't coming over until tomorrow for the football game, eh?" he asked, frowning as Alfred stared at him blankly.

"...that was tomorrow? Then what's today?" he asked as Matthew slapped a hand to his forehead.

"It's hockey night, Al," he said, giving his brother a pointed look as he made himself at home on the Canadian's sofa.

"Same difference right?" Alfred said as he reached for a handful of chips, earning an irritated sigh from his brother.

"Just please watch the game quietly, okay?" Matthew asked, settling in between Alfred and Gilbert as the teams made their way onto the ice.

And so the night began: Alfred making commentary about how he didn't get this game and how awesome his players were, Matthew trying to explain things to his brother while shouting at the ref (often simultaneously) while Gilbert continued to play on, giving his usual laugh every time he got either another badge or another 'awesome' pokemon. It wasn't until the break between the second and third period that things started to get hectic for the Canadian.

"Kesesese! I got another badge and another pokemon!" Gilbert exclaimed proudly, just having bet the Driftveil Gym mere minutes ago and was now in Chargestone cave. "I named him Gilspider since he's like Gilbird, but a spider instead of a bird," he explained as Alfred looked over to his game.

"You're only there dude? I already got six badges and Tony," Alfred said, taking out his own DS (which was covered in red, white and blue flags with multiple stars) and turning on his game, showing Gilbert that he did, in fact, have six badges and an elgyem named Tony. "Looks like you're way behind dude."

"Yeah well, Gilspider's so much more awesome than Tony," Gilbert replied smugly as the American frowned.

"Is not!"

"Is to!"

Matthew sighed, rubbing his temples lightly as the two on either side of him continued to argue about whose pokemon was better. "Why not just agree that they're both good, eh?" he asked as the game came back on, not even one bit surprised that his suggestion was ignored.

"There's only one way to settle this!" Alfred declared; locking eyes with the Prussian as the whistle for the third period rang out through the room.

"You bet your ass there is; just don't come crying to me when you lose, Yankee Boy."

"You'll be the one losing, Albino-rapist who keeps stalking my innocent baby brother!"

"Please; you know he likes me more than you."

"Says who?"

"Says the Awesome Me!"

"Yeah, well I challenge you to a battle!" Alfred declared, jabbing a finger into the Prussian's face, nearly missing Mattie's own by mere inches as Gilbert gave the American a shit-eating grin, both ignoring the now shaking blond that sat between them.

"Prepare to have your vital regions seized by me! Kesesese."

"No way in hell, Albino boy!"

"Will the both of you _shut up_ and battle somewhere else!" Matthew shouted; eyes narrowed into a rather sinister glare as he looked between the two. "Here I am, trying to sit and _watch_ the game which I've been waiting for _weeks _to see, only to have you two get into a _stupid_ fight over a few _stupid _badges and pokemon that no one really cares about!"

"But Mattie-"

"He started it Birdie!"

"I don't care _who_ started it! Just shut the hell up and let me watch the goddamn game!" The room then fell silent, both Gilbert and Alfred putting away their games as the Canadian fixed them both with a glare that most would only see when the blond was on the ice.

"...we're sorry Mattie," they mumbled, sinking back into the couch as the Canadian turned his attention to the TV, letting out a cheer as the teams tied and went into overtime.

When it came to serious business, Pokemon couldn't compare to hockey; at least not in Canada's house.

**Fin**


End file.
